After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
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I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
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My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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