I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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