every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
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the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
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Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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