if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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