a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
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If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
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conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize