Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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