I'm so fucking centered right now
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize