Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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