I think i sorta joined a cult last night
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize