Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
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