Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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