things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Im part way to drunk.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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