She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
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