Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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