Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize