god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Randomize