Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize