I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
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