Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize