my text book just quoted the cookie monster
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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