some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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