I will die if light touches me.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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