watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Randomize