Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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