He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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