the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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