and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
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I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
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I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
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