the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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