4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I had to cum in my sink.
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