Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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