What a fucking waste of an outfit
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
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