he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize