drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
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