Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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