if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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