Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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