tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize