yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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