I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
you never un-have a 4some
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize