I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize