The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
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he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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