i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize