I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
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