just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize