just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
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Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
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