Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
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He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
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Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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