I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
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