Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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