her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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