Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize